Alright, if you're reading this get ready for a HUGE life update. 
I know, I've been gone for a while. But did you check out the poems I wrote? Yep, year 6 of 31 poems in 31 days is complete! 

Now, on to my life update, as usual it's chaos in couture. 

* I moved 4.5 hours away from home. I moved because the next best place after my hometown, is where I curently am because of the family + friends I already have here.

* I joined the corporate world. I know, people usually don't chase the corporate world, but I did, and it so far has been well worth it! I am loving my new job, the environment, and co-workers.,

*The Transition hasn't been as tough as I thought it would be. I am living {temporarily} with my cousins and niece & nephew until I move into my own place early 2018! This has definitely helped me with transitioning into a new city and life, tbh.

* I am making friends quicker than I thought I would. I have learned who my true friends are. True friends are there whether you are
near or far
happy or sad
strong or weak
 .similar or different.
But we eventually find out. And sometimes, life proves us wrong. I've learned that no matter what, I am aware of my emotions and there is only so much I can do, the rest is up to the other person and God.   

*I am happy with where I am in life. I am working, making friends, learning, and growing each and every day. Yes, there has been a lot of change. But I've learned to embrace change.

Chaos Chronicles: Part II


She Is Mysterious & Curious
Many words are submerged in her emotions
Year six comes to an end
So many changes
Transitions left and right
Every day has brought forth a new challenge  
Ready to take on the world head on
Intrigued by words and actions thus far
Only she knows the true meaning of each poem 
Uncover the passion for expressive poetry, curiosity sparks 
She smirks "you don't know me well, and you never will" 

She Is Mysterious & Curious

The Forbidden Fruit
Neither of us will change,
One day we will be estranged.
That is something that cannot be denied.
But rules and beliefs cannot be defied.
That one factor keeping us apart,
and we both knew that from the start.
Everything we felt, shared, and have will be hidden.
At the end of the day, we know it's forbidden.

The Forbidden Fruit

Take my Breath Away 
I stood in one of my favorite stores,
If I could buy it all, I would.
I browsed around, and of course the piece I had my eye on was sold out.
A limited edition.
I was standing in front of the mirror, you right behind me.
You picked out a piece with the stone I wanted, and put it around my neck.
Dainty, elegant, and little did I know it was mine.
Confused, and surprised,
Rambling otherwise I would've cried.
The way you care for me,
That, and all your gestures, take my breath away.

Take my Breath Away

Stand Out 
I was never a part of a clique.
I didn't want to be a part of just one group.
I had a diverse group of friends,
then at times, I didn't have many friends.
I never belonged.
Living in Austin, was worse.
I felt alone and isolated.
So, I came back home.
I drowned myself in my sorrows and rejections.
Then, I started a new journey and found where I belong.
I built myself up,
I created my own social circles.
I broke the social norm, and did not go into medicine.
I became a business woman, and diversified myself as much as possible.
I am still finding my way in life, 
 I know to not try and fit in,
but to stand out.

Stand Out

RIP: Roses & Relationships 
Flowers, they eventually die,
just like everything else in this world.
The roses were still fresh.
I picked the petals off one by one.
They were in my hand, and I crushed them. 
I took them to the backyard and put them in the compost.
It would create something different and new.
Which is what I was going to do.
The relationship was once blossoming,
but it had died.
Now I await for new roses.

RIP: Roses & Relationships

Keep up with the Chaos
This crazy roller coaster ride,
eventually subsides.
There are waves that wash away,
and a path is paved.
The ups and the downs,
give me smiles and frowns.
Life is chaos
and you learn how to carry on.

Keep Up with the Chaos

You Can Have Your Cake & Eat It Too
Stressed,
my stomach is full.
Full of butterflies and anxiousness.
Confused,
my stomach is self-conscious
Self-conscious of the tiny bulge that makes me uncomfortable.
Content,
my stomach is growling.
Growling for a home-cooked Indian meal and comfort.
Happy,
my stomach is wondering,
Wondering what I will eat next and feel good.

You Can Have Your Cake & Eat It Too

Dark Knight
Dark humor, Dark hair. Dark eyes.
Sarcasm in each sentence.
Each laugh was carefree.
Craving adventure, and more.
Someone who cares and listens.
Learning that life is better unplanned,
Expecting the unexpected,
Realizing we deserved better than before.
Dark humor, dark hair, dark eyes.
When we met, little did I know, you'd be my Dark Knight

Dark Knight


The Day Drags
It's just one of those days.
The day is dragging,
My eyes are drooping.
My back is aching.
Everyone is yawning.
I keep stretching.
And yet it's only 2 pm.
for today, that's all I'm writing.

The Day Drags


What I Want
I thought I wanted to create.
To read and write,
To photograph.
To communicate.
Then, I fell into a rut.
It was too redundant.
So, I searched and searched.
I didn't know if I should,
but I knew I couldn't lose writing and photography.
I needed to channel my energy elsewhere 5 days a week.
and so I took a deep breath,
I applied, I prayed.
And before I knew it, I was on my way.
I now want to write,
I want to create.
I want to be at work.
I am slowly finding my niche. 

What I Want


ABC
A new chapter.
Blessed with so much.
Chasing my dreams
Desiring for more
Eager to conquer the world
Fearing each step
Going the extra mile
Happy for the unexpected.
Imagine the possibilities
Just learning to take my time
Keeping my past in mind.
Learning in each step
Missing home and my parents
New things each day
Opportunity is on the horizon.
Pulling myself together
Quickly adapting
Remembering what I was taught
Starting new
Taking my time
Utilizing my resources
Visualizing my dreams
Wishing for nothing but the best
X marks the spot
You're on you own
Z, it's time to catch up on sleep.


ABC


Just Once More
One more embrace,
One more, ride in the wind.
One more. smile,
One more, adventure.
One more game night,
One more day full of laughs.
One more day that made me feel safe.
One more day that made me feel loved.
Each day we had, was just all of this.
I just want it all once more.

Just Once More


Sassy
I can be quick,
I can be slow.
I can be nice,
I can be mean.
I can be subtle.
I can be blunt.
I can be flat,
I can be sharp.
I am sassy.
Day 19


Sassy


The Decision
I repeated what we discussed we had come to,
as a family.
I looked to my sister, she nodded.
I looked to my sister, he nodded.
Everyone had lumps in their throat
And we all continued eating.
We had made the decision.
Day 18

The Decision


Go, Go, Go...Up
Wake up,
brush teeth,
make up.
Pray,
eat,
dress up.
Go, go, go.
 Drive, 
Gather,
show up.
Go, go, go.
Present,
converse,
rise up.
Go, go, go.
Home,
Dinner,
Clean up.
Go, go, go.
Prepare,
relax,
catch up.
Sleep.
Repeat. 

Go, Go, Go...Up


Face Everything & Rise
From the first day I was born I faced struggles 
and survived.
In my short yet long 23 years, 
I have been torn down,
and each time I get back up.
I kept hitting dead ends,
I made them into alternative routes.
I have no been believed in,
and it just made me work that much harder. 
I have learned to face everything, rise, 
and come back stronger each time.
I have learned, to let my tears fall,
and with it, go my fears
Day 16: Losing Your Fears & Tears



Face Everything & Rise


Vomit Words
Head is spinning,
a lump in my throat.
Stomach turns,
I begin to write,
and my mind vomits.
Day 15

Vomit Words


Xs & Os
To be able to hug you like an O.
To be able to catch some Zzzs.
To be able to lay with you like we're an x.
Like the way one dots an i, 
you kiss my forehead. 
Day 14: Move Your Words

Xs & Os


Yes, It's In My Head
Yes,
it's in my head.
My brain to be more specific.
There is a chemical imbalance.
Yes,
it's in my head,
but then it goes to my chest.
Yes,
it's in my head,
There is something that makes me cry uncontrollably.
Yes,
it's in my head,
but that doesn't mean it's not real.
Day 13: Mental Health

Yes, It's In My Head


Change is Constant
I'm gonna keep it real,
Today's style is not my feel.
There has been so much change.
Chewy is gone.
I moved. I started a new job,
in a new city, and am living in a home away from home. 
At times I feel the loneliness,
mostly at night. 
But then, I remind myself, that the only thing constant is change.
And I am doing just fine.
Day 12


Change is Constant


From A to Z
With a to z,
I form my words,
my words into sentences.
I realized what I wanted to say.
But I sometimes don't quite know the way.
But as I begin to write. 
The words leave my mind,
and leave my lips.
I whisper as I write, the words that flow on to the page
like the bass on that Beatles song...
Day 11: Move with Your Words

From A to Z


Power Hour
I have learned,
that time is of the essence.
When I was born,
I was given a bleak prognosis.
I was not supposed to survive.
I proved the doctors wrong.
When I was young,
I was given a diagnosis,
I was not going to be okay.
I proved the doctors wrong.
When I was in high school,
I was given a path to take,
I made my own.
When I was in high school,
I was bullied,
I became a loner,
then I was a goner. 
When I was in college,
I was given  opportunities,
I ran with it and left a mark. 
Now, I am a business woman. 
Self-made blogger and photographer.
I am a daughter, sister, best friend, cousin, 
and an independent woman in control of my life.
Every bit counts, even this hour. 
Day 10: Power & Control

Power Hour


Don't Choke
a gray film blanketed the room,
I could not see anything anymore. 
Our trust was broken even more than before.
Smoke filled the room,
A lump in my throat,
but I wouldn't let myself choke.
I had been broke,
The room was no longer full of smoke. 
I took in a deep breath, I walked away,
and now I can exhale. 
Day 9: Smoking/Cigarette, Mystery, Intrigue 

Don't Choke


Explore & More
How do I know what road to take?
Which exit to take?
Do I turn left or right?
Right know, I don't know anything.
I am starting and writing a new chapter in my life.
I know I will make mistakes,
I know I will have to learn a new city.
I know I will have to build a social life here.
I am not starting over, I am starting fresh.
I will figure things out,
Is this the best move for me?
I'm not supposed to know all of this,
This is everything I get to figure out.
It's my time to explore, and more.
Day 8

Explore & More


I Deserve Better
I was not going to go through this again.
"You'll realize what you had once you don't have it."
Oh, no why did I say that? What was I thinking?
I said it, then regretted it.
But then, I realized it was true.
I said things I would not be able to take back.
 I scoffed, chuckled, and made sarcastic remarks.
I was tired, emotionally and mentally exhausted.
I was done being taken advantage of, not being valued, and being put second or lower.
I know realize, I may have gone too far,
but that doesn't change the fact that I deserve better.
Day 7: Confessional/I Went Too Far...


I Deserve Better

Back and forth, but still watching her.
She was down, and sad.
Regardless, it was going to happen.
I would soon have a void.
I looked at my blue-eyed cat,
and knew it time to put her out of her pain.
I braced myself, and paced towards her,
 for what would be the last time, my heart racing.
Day 6: Pacing

Goodbye Chewy

Wind Beneath My Wings
As I am about to leave the nest,
I take with me your teachings, lectures, and advice.
I understand,
knowledge is power and ignorance is not always bliss. 
I understand,
 that not all that glitters is gold.
I understand,
I must treat others the way I wish to treated.
I understand
 in order to succeed I must make my own mistakes.
I understand
asking for help is not a sign of weakness, but rather a sign of strength.
I understand
that what is on the inside is more important that what is on the outside.
I understand,
I must take risks to achieve the impossible.
I understand,
in order to receive, I must first give.
 As I am about to leave the nest,
I take with me your teachings, lectures, and advice.
I am about to fly,
and you are the wind beneath my wings.
Day 5: I Finally Understand....

Wind Beneath My Wings

Between the clouds and the water,
it is bright, yet there is darkness
Hidden in the bright hues of red, orange, and black,
a day is beginning, another is ending.
On the horizon, my words engulf into a poem
disguised as a sunset, it is a fire.
As the sun shines, my poetry ignites. 
Day 4:Between the clouds and the water...Where do you find your poetry?

Poetry Ignites

I look at you in awe
taking such gentle care
with your rough hands
You have become
my armor,
protecting me.
Day 3: Taste of Metal/Cherita Poem

Man of Steel

Why I Write
I confess, I do not write every day,
But in the days I do, I remember why.
I started writing in twenty-ten,
there is nothing like putting paper and a pen.
Being young, I was automatically naive,
so what I had to say, who would believe?
So, I began to write for my own right,
Over the years, through the hard times, breakups, heartaches, and fights,
I had words that would help heal.
Each time I broke, I wrote. 
Each day is a battle I must fight,
and so I write. 
Day 2: We Write Because We Must

Why I Write

It's October Poetry Writing Month guys! You know what that means, 31 poems in 31 days. Let's jump right in!
One Life to Live
Born two months too early,
But the Lord showed mercy.
Health troubles day in and day out,
Something my family didn't have to worry about.
Blessed, I was, and am,
Until the darkness began.
After years of not knowing the way,
I learned to seize each day.
Life continued to break me, 
and finally I broke free.
The outlook of my life was bleak,
But look at me now, I'm at the peak.
Day 1: How Did I Get Here?

One Life to Live

I am seeing such great community support after TS Harvey. However, I want to address all the "Negative Nancy" attitude people out there. Yeah, you know who you are. Yes, I'm talking to you.
Let's stop bitching and moaning about:
How the store is out of bread
People are buying to donate to shelters
The amount you had to spend on gas
Many lost their vehicles in the flood. The fact that you're getting gas means you're able to get from point A to point B. Victims don't even know what their point A is.
The traffic you're getting stuck in
Many still can't get out of their neighborhoods and I'm sure they would love to sit in traffic instead of their homes or a shelter. 
How 'hot' it is outside
You have AC in your home and your car - many do not. After over 5 days of rain, be thankful that the sun is out and helping rid of *some* of that water that has invaded lives and homes.

At the end of the day you still have:
a roof over your head:
Over 100,00 homes have been destroyed
a bed to sleep on
People have to get rid of their mattresses that have been sitting and soaking in dirty flood water. Thousands are in shelters laying on blankets that lay on top of concrete floors. 
food on your table
Those in shelters, and others are having to think about where their next meal is going to come from while you're deciding whether to get a medium soda or large. 
a life
Over 40 lives were lost due to Hurricane/TS Harvey. Yours wasn't.

Can we learn to be more thankful for the blessings in our lives and stop worrying about these pesky problems? All it is does is show that you are privileged.

Privileged

The Sun overlooks Galveston, TX
The Sun Will Come Out
The sun peeks out after five dark days,
From a young age, we are taught to not hate,
I pray, that the light is here to stay.
My heart is heavy as we wait.
Water is something we cherish,
We are taught it is a necessity for survival.
Without it we would perish.
But these days, water is the rival
I watch the news and hear of my loved that have had to evacuate.
Harvey, you have wreaked havoc upon my city.
To be our own homes, we must wait.
The amount of water is an absolute monstrosity. 
From a hurricane to tornadoes to storms, there has been end in sight.
You have washed away ten lives, destroyed thousand of homes, and taken countless belongings,
And just as my hope starts to waiver, we see a light,
Even in the worst of times, we will continue to strive, survive.
The comfort of home we are longing.
But, in the debris Texans have found hope.
With us are lending, of all colors and sizes.
 Blessed with thoughts and prayers from around the globe
Despite the gray skies, our community continuously rises.
Just like the sun is  starting to shine bright, 
Our faith is slowly restoring with might.
We have weathered the storm and again, the sun will come out.

The Sun Will Come Out

How are you? Sorry for my disappearance from the web. I know I have been super MIA. Does starting a new job count as an excuse? Okay, no it doesn’t uh..what about a hurricane? Tornadoes? Several tropical storms? Yeah? Well, thanks. {Not that I need anyone's permission} In case you forgot, I am in Texas and smack in the middle of where all the hurricane/tornadoes/tropical storms are taking place. It's time to be 100% honest, uncensored. I'm going to be completely open with you guys  So, without further ado I present to you
I was dreading it being a Monday + having to work from home {it's a good thing and a bad thing to have such a flexible job}. As annoyed as I was to be working, throughout the day I realized I need to count my blessings twice. I wrote this from the comfort of a dinning room table. My aunt was in the kitchen cooking. My cousin working away on his laptop. I had a nice cup of coffee, and some cinnamon raisin toast. Neighbors were going to shelters so my cousin’s wife gave some of our canned food and water to donate because we are lucky and our power has not gone out. I am so, so, so blessed that I have family north of where I live that were all willing to take my sister and I in, as well as my cat. My other cousin is unfortunately allergic. I am lucky to have family spread out, and their doors and hearts are always open.
Although this is reported as the worst flooding in the history of America, I do have to give the first responders and city mad props for rescuing so quickly, doing evacuations, and neighboring cities for helping out too. At least 10 have lost their lives, 300,000+ are without power, and many, many homes are gone. Things in a home can be replaced. But lives cannot. Going through this hurricane has really opened my eyes about being prepared, lending a hand, and keeping my faith strong. Homes have broken, lives have been lost, but our spirit and faith may be shaken, but it is not broken. I have numerous family friends that are in shelters. A very close friend who would have lost everything if they hadn't trekked out in the high waters to their home to move their belongings to the second floor.
Even though I was salty to be working, but as I call it a day, I am lucky to have been able to work today {even if it is a Monday. I am lucky to have been able to wake up today. I am lucky to have been able to eat today, be with family, and even write this. Sending prayers and warm wishes to all those who need it. Hurricane Harvey, or Tropical Storm Harvey although we Texans are known for our hospitality, you have, without a doubt overstayed your welcome.

Chaos Chronicles: Hurricane Harvey

Hey folks, so as you know my BFF Nikki and I took a trip to Cali during Spring Break. Finding a place to stay in LA that doesn't cost an arm and a leg but it still near the city and not too far from LAX. We found this cute little hotel called the Beverly Laurel Hotel. For the price, space, location, and oh-so-cute vintage decor - we both found this to be a win in our book! Right next door is a little dinner, and there food was pretty good too!
Beverly Laurel Hotel:
Rating:  ★ ★ ★ ★
Located on Beverly Blvd in LA it is walking distance to Hollywood Blvd, and a convenient spot if you're looking to go to Hollywood Hills too! I wandered around the streets of LA and found some cute wall art and what not:
Artist WRDSMTH has pieces that can be found all over the U.S.!! 

 After a walk down Hollywood Blvd to go to LaLa Land, an all-in-one awesome gift shop that is on the Walk of Stars! Here you can find literally everything and anything. T-shirts, little Oscar Magnets and awards, mugs, and everything in between!
LaLa Land Gift Shop
Rating:  ★ ★ ★ ★ 

I most definitely want to go back to California to explore! I have a little travel itch...

LA Hits




About a week ago, I posted my {new} skincare essentials and wrote about the Mario Badescu drying lotion. Well, I picked up EradiKate from Sephora and decided to put them to the test. Are you ready?

$17 @ Ulta
Mario Badescu is described as a Drying Lotion that is a "fast acting, effective acne spot treatment". One of the main ingridients in the MB Drying Lotion is that is contains Calemine, hence the scent that takes me back to my childhood of when I had chicken box. Calemine is designed to treat pain, itchiness, and discomfort. When I used this it took more than 3 days to dry out a breakout I had. It did the job - but way too slow. In addition, it dried as soon as it touched my skin. Throughout the night it would crack and flake or peel off.

Price: $26@ Sephora
EradiKate is described as effective treatment to fight blemishes and minimize pimples, acne, and help prevent future breakouts. This does not have that calamine but it felt a lot cooler on the skin, and not as thin as the MB Drying Lotion did. However, this does have magnesium aluminum silicate which helps thicken the product. Although this can be practically useless, maybe this is what helped in keeping the treatment on my breakouts throughout the night! This helped my breakout in just ONE night. EradiKate does have sulfur in it, and an overall higher concentration of acne fighting ingredients! So, is the extra 9 dollars worth it?

Yes, I definitely think it is worth it. Overall it's better quality and more product!

Ratings
Mario Badescu                                           EradiKate
 ★ ★ 1/2                                                        ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Mario Badescu vs EradiKate

Many decide to take care of their skin once problems start to happen, but to make sure fine lines, wrinkles, and dark spots don't occur - it's all about taking preventative measures. Let's jump into some of my favorite and go-to skincare essentials and see how I rate them out of 5 stars!

 Biore Pore Unclogging Scrub
Use: Exfoliates and removes impurities. I use it in the shower for a nice scrub!
Price: ~ $7 @ Target {can also be found at drugstores}
 Rating: ★ ★ ★ ★

Biore Charcoal Pore Strips
Use: Apply to face/nose when skin is wet, let it dry completely. This helps remove impurities, whiteheads, blackheads, peach fuzz, etc. Even if it's not a charcoal strip, and it's generic brand - they work!
Price: ~ $7.49 - $11.99 @ Ulta, Target or a local drugstore
 Rating: ★ ★ ★ ★ 

OLEHENRIKSEN The Clean Truth Foaming Cleanser
Use: I use this with a drop of Tatcha Pure Oil and this cleanses my skin so gently but really gets dirt and even any left over make up off of my skin!
Price: $30 @ Sephora
Rating: ★ ★ ★ ★

 Mario Badescu Drying Lotion
Use: Apply with a Q-Tip onto acne/breakouts, let dry overnight. The first time I used this - it worked overnight. I've been using it the past 3 days on 3 breakouts, and it's not drying out the break outs. I'll be trying Eradi-Kate by Kate Somerville soon. Want to see a comparison?
Price: $17 @ Ulta
Rating: ★ ★ 1/2

Dr. Denis Gross Ferulic Acid Retinol Brightening Solution
Use: Every morning + night before moisturizing
Price: $88 @ Sephora
Rating:

Caudalie VinoPerfect Radiance Serum
Use: Applying this to specifically dark spots as well as all over the face helps lighten dark spots, dullness and uneven skin. I have been using my sample size I received from Sephora.
Price: $79 @ Sephora
Rating

Oliology 100% Natural Rosehip Oil Collagen Facial Treatment
Use: I use this especially when my skin feels dry to help with dark spots
Price: $20 via Amazon
Rating ★ 

Tatcha Pure One Step Camellia Cleansing Oil
Use: I actually use a drop or two of this with the OLEHENRIKSEN Cleanser, and it leaves my skin super soft! I also like to apply this to my face before using the Dermaplaner.
Price:  $15- $48 {depending on size}Sephora
Rating: ★  ★

Belief The True Cream Aqua Bomb
Use: I use this as my holy grail night + morning moisturizer and has been through the ultimate test - Texas Heat! This is cool on the skin and leaves my skin hydrated.
Price: $38 @ Sephora
Rating

Supergoop! Everyday Sunscreen Broad Spectrum
Use: Sunscreen, typically apply after moisturizing before any type of primer for make up. This isn't thick or tacky on my skin. Has a typical sunscreen smell though.
Price: $19- $148.00 depending on size @ Sephora
Rating:    

Soap & Glory - The Righteous Butter Body  Lotion
Use: As a body lotion, the scent isn't too strong and this leaves my skin soft without leaving behind a residue or tacky feel!
Price: $10.99- $12 @ Target or Ulta
Rating:
Soap & Glory - Peaches & Clean Deep Cleansing Milk / Melt Away MakeUp
Use: I like to use this as a makeup remover more than a cleanser. It doesn't leave a heavy residue whatsoever nor does my skin feel stripped - but it removes all my makeup!
Price: $10.99 -$12 @ Target or Ulta
Rating:

Tweezerman Bright Complexion Facial Dermaplaner
Use: After my nighttime facial cleanse, I apply some serum and cleansing oil to my face and use this in a down up motion to get dead skin and what not off. I've only used it twice, so I'll have to see in about a week or longer if it really works. And yes it gets my peach fuzz off too!
Price: $30.00 @ Ulta 
Rating:    
 Tweezerman Complexion Cleansing Brush
Use: I use this typically with a foaming cleanser in circular motions. So far I find using it with something that does not already have scrubbing beads or an exfoliant really helps. It's super soft, and I love the it has a cap that has holes to allow for drying.
Price: $16.00 @ Ulta
Rating:    ★ 

 With stress and changes my skin has been acting up these past few weeks so I am excited to see how sticking to a routine + these new products work out! 

Skincare Essentials

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